Fate is funny, I know it is!
by GR4YS
Summary: Being the most attractive guy in school, Naruto has to struggle with all the girls that are interested even after demonstrating indifference. That is, until a new girl comes by and turns his world upside down with the struggles of relationships, problems and of course his very own fan club tends to get in the way. This is a rewrite of Fate is Funny, isn't it?
1. Chapter 1

Fate is funny, I know it is!

Chapter 1:

The bustling school has all its students running around and conversing as the hour gets closer and closer to go home for most of the student body. Naruto reluctantly opens up his old locker as a love letter slips out onto the floor.

"God, another one!" says Naruto as he looks at it with disgrace and disgust. He notices even a kiss mark on the letter. "I'm telling you these girls are gonna be the end of me one day, I swear!" he utters out.

A few steps away, his best friend, or only friend, Sasuke, walks up to him and pats Narutos back. They are very much used to this being a daily thing. Sasuke smiles and pats Naruto even harder on the back and says, "Man, another letter?"

Naruto sighs, "Yeah, looks like it. I just don't understand these damn girls. They're so desperate! When will they learn to quit?!" he says.

Sasuke chuckles loudly while saying, "Seriously man?" Sasuke knows that Naruto is a lucky guy, most guys would kill for that kind of attention, "You can't see the benefits of being so popular with the _ladies_? How can you be so empty on the inside?!" Sasuke continues.

" Listen", Naruto says as he closes his locker and turns to Sasuke, "I couldn't care less of what anyone thinks about me. I just want to finish sophomore year in peace. Is that too much to ask for? Peace? God."

Sasuke doesn't and will never understand Naruto, hell, most people don't, let alone any of the student body members. He just cant wrap his head around the idea that Naruto can get any girl he wants yet he doesn't because of his indifference. "Well, I think it's nice to be in a relationship with a girl during high school. It provides a sort of cliché kind of friskiness that every love story needs", Sasuke says.

Naruto cant even muster up the strength to tell his friend off, where does he even start? Narutos come to a realization that his friend will never fully understand him. Its beyond repair, par for the course for Sasuke. "Wow" Naruto says, "You are so beyond repair, its astonishing."

Sasuke just shrugs off the comment and replies, "I dunno, just spit balling here."

Naruto bumps his head onto the locker door out of frustration causing even more love letters to fall out of his locker. "Damn locker", Naruto says annoyingly.

But of course Sasuke doesn't stop his relentlessness on the topic,"did you even take a look at any of them?" Sasuke says.

Naruto gives a stinker look and replies, "Of course not. As if."

Sasuke picks up a random letter and opens it up quickly. He pulls out a picture, "Look, its has a pic of a girl in it!" Sasuke says. "So?" Naruto snaps back.

"Its..." says Sasuke, "Its her in a bikini."

Naruto repeats, "So?"

"She's got a pretty nice rack" says Sasuke.

Naruto continues repeating, "So?"

Sasuke blushes and says, "Oh, and shes got a nice A-S-S."

"  
So?" Naruto finishes saying this as Sasuke throws the picture of the scantily dressed girl onto Narutos face blocking his vision."I mean..." Naruto says, "shes aight."

This gets to Sasuke. He cant believe that Naruto remains unfazed by the awesome photo he found just piled onto a bunch of junk letters Naruto had. "Man, its incredible that you simply just do not care!" Sasuke says as they walk the halls together, "maybe I can… borrow this photo for a while?"

Naruto sees the excitement in his eyes and replies, "Knock yourself out, you can have it. I'm sure some where in that pile is a few nudes taken just for me, at least I wouldn't be surprised."

The halls get louder and louder as they get closer to the exit. Signs and clutter fill the hallways so they shimmy around as to not trip over anything. "Man!" Sasuke howls in delight, "if I were in your shoes! Oh the things I would ask girls to do for me! The possibilities are endless!"

Both of them walk outside and go on their way home. Near by, they stop at a local video game store to browse a bit. Naruto goes up to look at the action and adventure games while Sasuke looks at the eroge games and visual novels. Sasuke is still looking at some adult games when he says, "so, did you hear that there's gonna be a new girl coming to our school this Monday?"

Naruto gets really annoyed by this question, "What do you think?" Naruto asks, "I don't have my finger on the pulse of the whole school!"

Sasuke laughs loudly, "Hahaha!" he says, "Whatever, I just hope shes a hottie. We need as many hot girls in our school as we can get!"

In with all the adventure games, Naruto flips and looks through a good chunk of game titles. Naruto notices a game not in its place, upon further inspection he sees that its an eroge. He immediately goes up next to Sasuke and hands it to him, "Here you go" Naruto remarks, "this is more up your alley."

Sasuke obviously misinterprets this gesture because he takes the game from Narutos hand and replies, "Oh yeah! An eroge! Totes up my alley. Looks like its not out of the question for you too though! That's why you don't like girls, you're too busy infatuating yourself with virtual ones!"

Naruto laughs at the idea and says, "Ha, that's freaking gross man."

Sasuke shrugs it off, "I'm stating a real possibility here" he says.

The both finish off their visit of the game store buying a few used games. They step outside and notice that its getting dark. Sasuke looks at his watch and freaks out, "Sorry man! I need to go bro. Its dark and I'm not too fond of the dark. Ghosts are more likely to come out around this time. I'll see you in school, okay?" he says then runs towards his home while waving Naruto goodbye from a distance.

Naruto shakes his head and says to himself, "God he drives me insane."

The path continues as Naruto strolls along a very familiar way to get to his place. From a distance he overlooks and sees a girl looking around in confusion. She keeps turning her head and walking around in disorientation, or at least, that's what Naruto could perceive. He wasn't for sure at what the girl was doing because the warmth and strength of the glistening sun on her body only made her silhouette visible to his eyes from where he was standing.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, there is a neighborhood watch in this area", Naruto says, but almost as soon as the words flow out of his mouth the girl turns around. And almost, at least in Narutos eyes, the black silhouette turns from a mere fragment into a beautiful young lady. The sun blinded him but the girl helped recuperate his vision.

The girl goes up to Naruto and he notices her body, average at best, but stellar for Naruto. The closer she got to him the more his heart skipped beats. She finally replies, "Oh, sir. Sorry to bother you, but do you know where the Rose View Apartments are?"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Nervously, he clenches his hands into a fist and puts them to his side to reserve his feelings. Naruto hasn't felt this way in a long time. He can feel the blood rush from his face to his gut with anxiety. He takes a step to draw closer to the girl.

"You see..." the girl continues, "I got lost at this spot. I have no idea where its at! All these roads look the same to me, really." as she finishes saying this she strolls up to Naruto. He takes a step back as a jerk reaction.

Naruto takes a deep breath to release some of the nervousness inside him. He finally utters the strength to say, "Rose view apartments?" that's all he could muster up.

He comes to the realization that he lives in those very apartments. Why didn't he just show her the way from the get go? Honestly, this girl caught him off guard. Not only was he disoriented by the idea of this girl that he just met following him, but also by the fact that he was breath-taken by the girl made him that much more lost in himself.

The young girl smiles and replies, "Yes. Do you know where they're at? Could you show me the way?"

"Uh… of course!" Naruto says. He turns to the direction that he was going in and says again, "Of course!". They both go on, the young girl follows next to him contently as he nervously thinks on and on.

They draw closer as they walk but he remains pretty silent. Trying to break the ice, the young girl says, "So, have you lived in this area for a while?" 

Naruto, surprised by the question, turns his head to her and says, "Yeah, pretty much my whole life." 

He tries to act nonchalantly but his eagerness leaks through like a vessel, "Do you live in those apartments?" she asks.

"Yup, I do. I've been here for a while." Naruto says, "I even know the owner, so since they know me, they made me the on-site assistant property manager."

"That's pretty cool!" she says.

After some walking, they finally arrive to the apartment building. The girl goes up and down, looking at the building from all sorts of angles. She takes a step up to the front and looks at the bench next to the apartments. 

She shakes her head and says, "Wow, this buildings pretty big!"

Naruto is kind of confused by this notion, "It's only three floors." he says.

"Well..." she says, "where I'm from we don't really have buildings. I mean, we barely had a bus route."

Naruto nods and tries to smile at her, but it doesn't come out naturally at all and it hurts his cheek bones. After her thorough inspection of the apartment building, he points towards it and says, "How about we get you settled in?"

She agrees and follows Naruto inside. There he gets the paperwork she had filled out before hand. He looks it over making sure everything is complete. After this he goes into the back, hands her the keys to the apartment. "Follow me, I'll show you where its at." he says.

After they arrive she takes the keys Naruto had just handed her and she opens the door curiously. She gets so animated that she goes all over the apartment and starts giggling with excitement.

"OH MY GOD!" she says, "All this to myself!"  
She goes up to Naruto and shakes his hand vigorously. "Thanks so much for everything!" she says.

"Of course." Naruto replies. "I'm just down that hall, if you need anything, just let me know. Take care… Hinata."

This startled her for a second, she never told him her name. She scratches her head and says, "Thanks! Uh… You too Mr…?" she stops and realizes that he never introduced himself.

"Naruto… Just Naruto." He says as he closes the door behind him. He tried to be slick, it seemed cool in his head. Kind of like the whole 'Bond, James Bond' quote, but different. Hinata giggles a bit more and says to herself, "Naruto, huh?"

Naruto goes off to his apartment, throws his bag on the floor next to the entrance and jumps onto the black leather sofa he has. He ponders this whole feeling thing. Naruto thinks about his departure with Hinata. That was a bit hammy, but it seemed cool at the time. Either way, his chest was still pounding, but she was very down to earth. Maybe this feeling means something to him. 

"Wait a second..." he says, "Was I being really nice to her? That's very unlike me." After much pondering his stomach begins to grumble.

That means its dinner time.

 **Next Morning**

Naruto already at school, is having a conversation with his loyal companion Sasuke. They're in an empty room that they occasionally go to to have conversations in private. It's no secret that Naruto is a very reluctantly popular kid in school, so they must have the seclusion at times to talk privately.

Naruto says to Sasuke, "And as soon as I saw her, dude… I felt my heart explode with emotions. I've never felt like this before! I didn't know what to do. Like, she really got to me."

"So..." Sasuke says, "A girl finally got your heart to grow three sizes, nice!"

Naruto shakes his head and asks, "Why am I even telling you this?" Sasuke pats his back furiously and nudges Naruto while winking his eyes insistingly. "Cause I'm all you've got" Sasuke says, "and you this means you trust me!" 

Sasuke snickers at the idea, but Naruto quickly rebuttals, "Now, I wouldn't go that far."

"Who cares anyways," Sasukes insists, "Do you know her name, did she tell you?" 

Naruto replies, "Yeah, Hinata."

"You're a fast worker! How'd you find that out so quickly?"  
"Turns out she's renting an apartment where I live. So shes a new tenant. What are the chances, right?" Naruto says.

Sasuke starts to crack up with a mix both laughter and a bit of envy.

"You're a lucky guy, Naruto!" Sasuke says, "I hate how freaking lucky you are!"

As they talk, Naruto hears a whisper from the closet. He pats Sasuke, signaling that someone might be listening in on their conversation. They both shut up and get up to the closet door.

He winks at Sasuke, puts his hand on the doorknob and says, "Yeah… She really caught me... OFF GUARD!" and as he yells this he bursts the door wide open and out comes a closet full of teenage girls.

Naruto steps to the side as the girls keep getting up beside him from the ground and he yells out, "What the heck were you guys doing in there?!"

Sakura, one of the many girls, points her index finger at him and says, "You being in love with another girls is unacceptable! This cannot be! Am I not good enough for you? None of us are good enough for you?" She presses around her body to try to arouse Naruto, but to no avail.

Ino, another girl in the bunch, bumps her body around Naruto willingly, "What about me?" she says while shaking her hips.

Completely stone faced and anger ridden, Naruto opens exit door and holds it open for them. He jabs his hands out and yells, "WHY DON'T YOU GIRLS JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?!"

The girls all look to each other and start walking away. Naruto takes a sigh of relief and walks back to Sasuke who was behind him the whole time. Sasuke nervously shakes around and runs behind the girls ahead of him and utters out, "Wait girls! I'm totally free! I'm single and ready to mingle! WAIT!"

None of the girls seem to bat an eye.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

The next morning comes as quickly as yesterday left. Naruto has had all this time to meditate on his feelings and really settle on them. He can feel his stomach churn and turn inside him. Butterflies, goosebumps, many sentiments go through his body. Most are new to him. He's a foreigner to most of these kinds of things.

Naruto never was the kind of guy to get emotional about a girl or, heck, even be attracted to one. This hasn't stopped most of the girls he's come across from throwing themselves onto him.

Both Naruto and his only real friend are standing next to each other while looking through their lockers and getting their belongings. Sasuke pats Naruto on the back vigorously. "Dude, I can't wait to see who the special girl is! This must be one kind of a girl if you like her, that's no easy feat." Says Sasuke to Naruto.

This makes Naruto more embarrassed than he was already.

"Is she hot?" Asks Sasuke.

"Define hot." replies Naruto.

"You know, cute face, stellar body, the works."

Naruto just shakes his head, "That's all superficial" he replies, "None of that is necessary. But I can see how you'd benefit from it!"

Sasuke gawks, "HA! You know what? That's..."

Right before he can finish his sentence a new face walks by with a piece of paper in her hand. Her face turns from one side to the other, looking for her locker, apparently.

"Hm..." Sasuke thinks aloud, "I've never seen that girl before! I guess she's a new student here. Too bad, she doesn't really have any outstanding features about her. What do you think Naruto?"

Naruto felt her presence, as soon as the girl passed by, he dug his face into his locker to hide from her. Or at least hide his red, flustered face.

"Whats wrong?" Asks Sasuke.

Naruto says from the inside of his locker, "That's her."

"Hm?"

"That's the girl."

Surprisingly, Sasuke turns to his friend, then looks at the girl. One plus one equals two.

"That girl?" Asks Sasuke repeatedly.

"Uh-huh." Naruto says shyly.

Sasuke still is doing the math in his head. How is it possible that the "hottest" guy in high school likes the most Plain Jane you've ever seen? It's hard to believe. Sasuke continues his gawking at Naruto, "Wow! No wonder you never liked any girls at school, you like average girls! Pale ones at that."

Naruto would let the ground swallow him up if possible. This is too much for him to handle. Get a grip, this isn't the worst thing ever. But alas, Naruto peaks his head out of his locker in sheer curiosity, or out of interest, to have a look at the new girl. Almost immediately, Hinatas head turns towards him and they make eye contact.

She gets all excited and walks up to Naruto. Rapidly he closes his locker door because Naruto knows that his locker probably has some things that Hinata should not be exposed to. He closes it so quickly that he squished some of Sasukes arm fat because he was leaning against his locker.

"Wow, look who's here! Not only do we live in the same apartment, but we also go to the same school! Crazy!" says Hinata cheerfully.

Naruto is still blushing furiously, but Hinata seems oblivious to all this. Naruto then says, "Guess so. That means high school just got better! Good to have you!"

"Likewise!" Hinata says, "Who knows? Maybe we'll even end up in the same home room!"

Hinata waves them goodbye and goes towards the other direction to find her homeroom. Naruto sighs a sigh of relief. That's over with, who knows? Maybe they wont be in the same classroom, or maybe even, they'll be in completely different ends of the school and never see each other.

Sasuke raises his eyebrow and pokes fun at Naruto, "What a surprise! Naruto actually being nice to a girl. This must be true love. True love I tell you! Straight from cupids arrow to your cold barely beating heart!"

Naruto grumbles and punches Sasukes arm. "Shut up!" Naruto says.

"Ok. I'll stop. I forgot how strong you are." Sasuke says caressing his arm and trying to relive his pain.

The two of them walk into the classroom ready to begin class. All the other students begin to follow behind them. Naruto doesn't delay, he takes his assigned seat immediately. Sasuke just stands next to him confusingly, "What? Why are you sitting? You and I usually stand and talk." Sasuke asks.

"Listen man. I… I can't talk right now. My heart… it's beating so fast… I think I'm going to have a heart attack." Naruto says while clenching his hands into a fist and grabbing his chest.

"Wait a sec..." says Sasuke flamboyantly, "Since when did you have a heart? Don't tell me, love is in the air! How romantic!"

Sasuke gets the ugliest look from Naruto, this scare him a bit and he backs off a step to give him a bit of space.

"Its true though." Sasuke says.

"Do you have any tums?" Naruto asks.

"What kind of man would I be if I carried tums around with me?"

"Ah, true, I guess you have a point."

Seemingly, out of nowhere, Sakura jumps into their conversation and hands Naruto a handful of pink tums.

"Here you go! I just happened to be in the area and I overheard you guys saying you needed this. So, here I come to the rescue!" Sakura says.

Naruto just grabs it from her hands begrudgingly and puts them into his mouth while he says, "Thank you I guess."

"Thank you? I think this is the first time you've ever said thank you to anyone in this god-forsaken school! This event must be saved for future reference." Sakura says as she pulls our a camera from her bra and hastily takes a picture of Naruto. She runs back to the other Naruto obsessed girls immediately after to show them her evidence.

All the crazed girls scramble around the picture like small mice with a piece or cheese, but this is stopped as soon as the teacher walks in.

"Alright class, take your seats, we have a long day ahead of us." The teacher says as the students in the classroom all sit down, "Good, now that everyone's seated, I'd like to introduce you to a new addition to our humble abode. Everybody, please welcome our new classmate. Hinata, come on in."


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

The young girl walks up to the front of the classroom. All the students stare at her and patiently wait for her introduction. Hinata smiles to herself, Naruto finds this extremely cute and he blushes. She eventually musters up courage enough to speak, "Hello, my name is Hinata. Nice to meet you all, it'll be pleasure getting to know everyone here during the semester" she says.

As soon as she finishes her statement, she notices Naruto in the back of the class. She waves at him and smiles out of sheer happiness. Dazed, Naruto waves back. The attention of all the girls in the glass turns to Naruto, they can see that his face is shot red and blushing vigorously. The glances then change their focus to Hinata, jealously, all the girls murmur about her, but Hinata, innocently enough, notices none of it.

The teacher sees Hinata wave at Naruto and says, "Well, it looks like you're familiar with Naruto. There's an empty seat next to him, why don't you go ahead and take a seat?"

Hinata replies, "Thank you sir." Happily she goes up to the seat by Naruto and sets her stuff on her desk. She whispers to Naruto, "Looks like we'll be neighbors in school too, huh?"

Naruto can't even feel his toes from how nervous he is, "Isn't that something?" he replies.

The air in the room gets thicker and thicker the more Naruto burns up. The murmuring continues and gets even louder than previously.

Sakura, one of the many Naruto-crazed girls, turns to Ino and asks, "Why is Naruto being so indescribably nice to her? Why is he blushing? He never acts this way normally!"

Ino replies, "I can't say for sure", she adds, "Let's just hope that she's not the girl that Naruto talked about earlier."

Feeling the presence of girls gossiping, Sasuke jumps into the conversation, " _Hello_ **ladies**!"

They all turn around in unison. Ino asks, "Hey, you're Narutos friend right?"

Sasuke proudly nods, "Why, yes I am! Why do you ask?"  
"Does Naruto like that girl?" Sakura asks.

"Chances are..." Sasuke replies, "But, I'm probably not the one who should say, love is a fickle thing! A mere spiders web withering in a dust storm of unexpected feelings and emotions! It appears you must solve this mystery for yourselves. Until then, would any of you girls like to give me your phone number, email, fax? Anything? ANYTHING?"

The girls turn away in disgust and face the front of the room to pay attention to the teacher. "I get no luck" Sasuke says to himself.

 **Lunch Time**

The sounds of the hundreds of students filling up the cafeteria resonate loudly after the lunch bell rings. Naruto looks at Sasuke who is pointing at the new girl, Hinata. Sasuke raises his eyebrow at Naruto signaling to invite the girl to eat with them.

Naruto looks nervously at Hinata as she gets her stuff ready for lunch. He picks at his pockets as she staggers toward her. She fixes her attention to him and asks, "Oh, hey Naruto. What's up?"

"Umm…."Naruto says, "I was w-wondering if you'd like to eat lunch with Sasuke and I?"

Hinata smiles and enthusiastically replies, "Sure! That sounds like a great idea! I think lunch is always better when you eat it with someone." She finishes her sentence when she notices Sasuke is nowhere to be found, "Wait a sec… where is this friend of yours?"

Naruto jumps and turns around to see that Sasuke, indeed, has disappeared. He thinks to himself, "Well that conniving little rat! He planned this all along. Just wait till I get my hands on him. I swear I'll..."

"Why don't we" his thought is interrupted by Hinata saying, "Why don't we just eat together that way afterwards you can show me around the school? This place is a maze, seriously. Where I'm from our school was really tiny compared to this one."

"Hey, that sounds like a deal!" Naruto says.

The both of them scramble the cafeteria for the food choices and go to the in-school courtyard to eat it. They sit in front of the fountain and begin talking about a little bit of this and a little bit of that. Soon, it gets to a point where Naruto asks, "So what kind of things do you like to do?"  
She replies, "I really enjoy listening to music and cooking. I consider my self a pretty good cook, though theirs always room for improvement."

"I agree" he adds, "But isn't that the truth with everything?"  
"Don'tcha find this kinda weird?" Hinata asks.

"What's weird?"

"The fact that we're both sitting and eating our lunch in front of a fountain, its kind of cliche."

And the conversation carries on for a while, up to the point where its getting time to finish up. Naruto looks at the clock near the inside of the school and says to Hinata, "Man, its almost time to go back to homeroom. We only have twenty minutes left, if we don't stop eating soon I won't have time to show you around the school. Let's head out."

Naruto helps Hinata up and they both go to the trash bins to toss their scraps away. They enter the building and Naruto gives her a thorough overview of the entire school. He's very detailed in his showings, he even points some students out to Hinata for her to steer clear from. Of course he also goes over some of the basic important rooms like the bathroom locations, guidance counselor room and many others.

"Looks like its time to return to homeroom, you coming?" Hinata asks as she takes a deep breath trying to soak in all the info she had just received.

"Oh, no" Naruto replies, "You go right ahead. I'll catch up with you in a sec."  
Hinata joyfully says, "Okay then. Thanks again for showing me around this labyrinth. I appreciate it!"

She walks away towards the classroom, but Naruto goes the opposite direction in a rush to get into the bathroom. As soon as he steps foot in the restroom he runs to the sink and throws water on his face.

His heart was beating so rapidly and so violently that he thought he was going to die.  
"Why..." Naruto asks himself, "Why does my chest get so tight whenever I'm just in her presence? I can't stand it!"  
When this comes out of Narutos mouth, almost immediately he hears a ruffle come from the ceiling.

Naruto yells out in confusion, "Whats that sound? Is it coming from the ceiling?"


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5:

A small crack seeps through where the sound came from. It grows and grows, at the sight of this Naruto steps back just as ten girls fall onto the bathroom floor covered with dust. They all try to pick themselves up from the floor and look presentable given the circumstances. Naruto stands, shaken by the actions of the girls, he can only

"What were you girls doing up there in the men's room?" Naruto yells out scoldingly.

The girls all look at each other and smirk. Tenten goes up and says, "We had a mission! A secret mission! One of utter importance!"

Another girl, Ino, adds, "Tell us Naruto, is Hinata the girl you're interested in? Is she the girl you like?"

These questions only bother the already annoyed Naruto, "It's none of your business who I like and don't like!" he says.

The girls laugh and one say, "Everything about you is our business!"

"That's just plain old creepy." Naruto says back, "Now if you don't mind please leave me out of your crazy antics? I'd not only appreciate it, but you'd also be doing the world a huge favor. Thanks. Bye."

He walks out and slams the door behind him angrily, the sound echoes through the bathroom walls that are inhabited by the girls. Even though Naruto had left, they continue conversing between themselves.

"That was even colder and meaner than how he usually acts." Observes Ino.

"We can give up! We must continue to persevere in the search of love!" Sakura adds.

"But…" Ino replies, "Perseverance won't give us Naruto. Being orthodox won't lend to our needed results."

Sakura puts her finger on her chin, "You might be right". Ino adds, "Maybe we should change our strategy a bit. We need to do something about our main problem right now, the new girl. And I have an idea."

*Back in class*

Naruto sits on his desk and takes a deep breath and sighs, "God, those girls are freaking insane."

Sasuke inquires, "What happened?"

"These girls seem to have an obsession with me. Why? I don't know. They won't leave me alone and refuse to stay out of my life. Before you know it they're going to have an official school club dedicated just to me with a Facebook page and website."

"Plus a twitter and YouTube channel too!" Sasuke says laughing at his friend's misery."

"What do you mean by that?" Naruto asks as Sasuke pulls out from his tattered, taped up wallet, a business card with the words "Official Naruto Fan Club" printed on it with fine ink.

"What the…" Naruto asks but is interrupted by Sasuke who says, "Oh, it gets better. Look, there's even an Amazon store for pictures of you!"

Narutos hands start to tremble with a mixture of anger and genuine fear. He wasn't aware that girls obsession with him was this desperate and creepy. He crumbles the business card up and tosses it to the ground, then kicks it to the side where no one would be able to see it.

Naruto can feel Sasuke slap his back and say, "The things you get for being the most attractive guy in the entire school."

"Hearing that come out of your mouth makes it sound so much worse" says Naruto.

From the corner, Naruto sees Hinata take her seat as she turns her attention towards the two of them.

"I don't believe I've me you before." She asks Sasuke.

"I don't believe we have. Hello there, I'm Sasuke. It's a pleasure." He replies.

"Ok everyone, back to your seats!" the teachers says loudly. Immediately everyone sits in their designated seat.

*Next day*

Naruto, surprisingly, wakes up early and begins looking through his drawers for some decent clothes to wear to school. He skims all the surfaces, yet finds nothing appealing.

"No good clothes" he whispers to himself. He opens and clothes every drawer in feudal attempts to find something interesting to wear. "So plain" he continues whispering, until the moment where he finds a decent shirt that he doesn't consider bland.

"This is perfect! I wonder If Hinata..." before he can even finish his sentence he hears a knock on the door.

Naruto runs up to the door and says, "I'm not interested in any sort of religious pamphlets you have to offer, nor do I want to subscribe to any dentist office magazine. Please just leave."

The voice on the other side says, "It's me, Hinata silly."

"O-OH Hinata. Of course, come… come on in!" he opens the door and sees Hinata with a plate of delicious looking breakfast in her hand.

"I was wondering…" Hinata says, "Since I'm new here and I don't really have too many friends, I was wondering if we could eat breakfast together. Anyways, it's the least I could do, you did show me around school yesterday and have been nothing but nice to me!"

"Well, since you're new here, I might as well. The food looks good too, how about I come over to your apartment as soon as I finish getting dressed up?"

Hinata smiles and nods, "Sounds great! See you in a bit! Oh, and don't forget to put on your pants before you go!" She says as she winks at Naruto and waves at him.

She walks back to her room as Naruto closes the door. "I can't believe how instinctively nice I am to her. My heart kills me every time I see her. I feel like it's going to burst through my chest."

He jumps out of excitement, "But she's so freaking adorable and sweet." Naruto stops for a second, "Wait a sec, what did she mean by put on my…" He looks down and realizes he had no pants on, only his boxers. His face immediately turns blood red as he rushes to the drawer again and grabs some pants to put them on.

Naruto paces back and forth before he goes to Hinatas apartment to mentally prepare himself.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

His steps weigh down against the floor. He can almost feel the floor lower underneath his feet, but of course it's all in his head. Eventually he stumbles up to her door. He knocks on the door very weakly, barely loud enough for a mouse to hear.

"Help yourself in!" Hinata yells out.

Naruto puts his hand around the door knob to open the door, and is surprised by what he sees. Just about the emptiest apartment he has ever seen. Of course, her apartment in considerably smaller than his. He takes a few steps in to see she merely has a few bean bags on the floor for seating, a tiny side table and a tiny tube TV.

"Don't be shy! Take a seat." She goes on as Naruto shakes around in his nerves.

"Are these the only chairs you have?" Naruto asks her in a joking manner.

"Yeah, pretty much. I don't really have what normal people call 'CHAIRS', but I have those bean bags. They're durable and lead an interesting tidbit." She replies.

Naruto sinks into the bag chair as he shifts around to find a comfortable spot, which there is none really. "Really? What is the story behind these?" he asks.

"You see..." she answers, "I got these because its like a pun. Like, when you say 'it's in the bag'. Well, those literally _**are**_ bags! So, I think its funny."

Naruto scratches his head out of confusion and says, "I'm not gonna lie Hinata. I don't think the pun is worth it!".

Hinata faces him seriously, "What you don't think so? I guess in retrospect, it _**is**_ a stupid story."

They both laugh at the visual of them both just sitting in an empty room with only bean bags and bare bones accommodations. She finishes cooking her breakfast meal for the two of them, hands him a plate and grabs some food for herself.

"So Naruto", Hinata asks, "how long have you been here?"

"Pretty much my entire life. My parents are kind of moguls because they own apartment buildings all over the country and even some properties in the states."

"I bet that's pretty exciting! You must have a cool life."

Naruto shoves more food in his mouth, "Not so much when you're by yourself pretty much your whole life" he replies.

Hinata lowers her head, "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to..."

Naruto interrupts saying, "Don t be! It was my decision. They asked me if I wanted to be home-schooled while traveling the world with them. But, at the time, I really didn't want to. This is my home town, I love this place for right now."

Hinata feels overwhelmed with sadness and asks, "What about now? What if you had to make that decision again?" 

"I don't know what I'd do..." he replies, "But that's enough about me. Tell me more about the town you come from."

"I moved here from a small, middle of nowhere, town. Nothing special. My parents, well… I love my parents, but they work really hard for me. You see, I'm what you would call 'sick' in layman's terms."

"Oh my gosh, is it serious?" he asks.

Hinata looks up at the ceiling and ponders over how to answer that question.

"It's not a big deal. I don't really want to talk about it" she says. 

"No, I totally get it." Naruto backs up.

Naruto tries to change the subject. "What do you think about the town so far?"

"It's been pretty nice. A lot more here than where I come from that's for sure!"

And so they continue to make small talk for a while until they need to go to school.

"OK Hinata!" Naruto happily says, "Thanks for the grub! Food through the tube makes me a happy dude!"

"You are such a dork!" Hinata replies giggling.

"I know. I'll see you at school!"

 **At school**

Naruto and Sasuke are both hanging around the lockers. Naruto pulls out his books into his hands as Sasuke prying information from his friend, "So, tell me, what happened?"

Naruto takes a deep breath and sighs. He's already tired of talking to Sasuke and he has just gotten started. Sasuke is like a doll that keeps talking when you pull the string. Except this doll doesn't have a string so it never stops talking, until it annoys you to death.

Naruto Replies, "It's not a big deal man. Just a little bit of this and that."

"What?" Sasuke says raising an eyebrow, "You sure you didn't make a move on her?"  
"Yeah, sure. I made a move on a girl that I've just met and started talking to. That sounds like a wonderful idea. Tell me Sasuke, do you have any more insightful ideas?"

Sasuke pats Naruto on the back, "Come on man" Sasuke adds, "do you really think that I think that you'd really do that? I was just testing you".

Naruto slams on the locker door with his books and it makes a loud bang.

"Listen man, I don't need you screwing around with me right now. Save that for someone else, would ya?" Naruto says.

"Man. I'm not gonna lie, I'm jealous of you! You get to live next to your crush. Right next to your **_sweetheart_**. You're not short on choices, by the way. You can have any of these girls!"

"Nah, I'm not into easy girls" Naruto replies.

"Just as I thought" Sasuke says, "your heart is as cold as ice, sonny boy! Who will thaw it out? That is yet to be seen!"

This banter goes on for a while. They stop when they a small ruffle and shuffle sound near by them. Both of them walk up to the side of the lockers nearing one of the many storage closets for cleaning supplies. Naruto steps right in front of the supply room door.

He nods to Sasuke, they both have seen this sort of behavior before so they know what to do. Naruto pulls the door open rapidly, expelling the girls onto the floor. The amount of girls that were pressed against the door eavesdropping on their conversation is astonishing.

"You girls are really something else. Why are their so many of you?!" Naruto yells.

Sasuke grabs Naruto, holding him back, he knows that Naruto isn't afraid of showing his true feelings.

"Screw them Naruto. Let's go somewhere else to talk about this" Sasuke says.

The girls, all hearing this statement, scatter around the boys like snakes to a mouse. Sakura being the leader of the pact points her finger at Naruto.

"So it's true!" Sakura says, accusing Naruto, "You are in love with the new girl! Unacceptable! Simply unacceptable! As president of the Naruto fan club we cannot permit this to go on any further!" 

Ino adds, "As vice president we must take immediate action regarding this predicament!"

Tenten, feeling left out, struts her body around Naruto and asks, "Naruto, that new girl is plain and ordinary. Why don't you give me a shot? I wont disappoint you, **_trust_** me."

Naruto coldly replies, "Your mere existence dissapoints me. Now, if you loonys excuse me, I'm leaving this psycho rink."

Naruto walks away from the situation. He doesn't even turn to see if Sasuke is behind him. But Sasuke takes advantage of the situation and offers himself as a ransom.

"Listen ladies. You can't have Naruto, but I'm still here!" Sasuke says as he pelvic thrusts around the girls. This must be one of his mating calls to attract those of the opposite sex, but to no effect.

All the girls turn to him and line up against him. They reek of a black aura that overpowers Sasuke, causing him to run back to Naruto.

After the coast is clear, Ino asks "What do we do now madam President?"

Sakura smiles devilishly and replies, "We need to do something about that girl he likes. I think I have a good idea".


End file.
